Reply To: How do you guys keep going?

#19510
miljacic
Member

As much as I would like to see Libertarian ideas and viewpoints spread across the globe (at least to be understood, if not agreed upon), even more would I like to see the widespread of quality communication tools, like the classic book: “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. That one is an old-fashioned but universal bag of goodies!

Maybe check it out on youtube, multiple people posted its audiobook? You might learn a lot about how to approach people, just like I learned a bunch.

A few illustrative quotes:

“Criticism is futile because it puts a man on the defensive, and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wound’s a man’s pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses his resentment.”

“If a man’s heart is rankling with discord and ill feeling toward you, you can’t win him to your way of thinking with all the logic in Christendom.”

“Remember the other man may be totally wrong, but he doesn’t think so. Don’t condemn him, any fool can do that. Try to understand him.”

It may seem I’m changing the subject, but the original post in this thread was not about ideas and logic and technical truth, but exactly about dealing with people. So I think my post is right on the topic.

Here’s a fresh example of how the book helped me. Just the other day I started talking to a colleague at work (who thinks he knows everything and is always right) about fractional reserve banking, and to my great surprise he managed to make me unsure about what I thought I understood well (that it’s inflationary). That is one very intelligent, technical person, by the way. However, I used all the stuff I learned from Dale Carnegie book, and our discussion was pleasant and creative. So, next day, I ask a question here on this board, and Mr. Herbener answers it in a way to make it clear again. But in the process I got excellent shakeup, I realized I wasn’t as solid in my understanding as I thought I was, that in some aspects I was shaky.. and now I benefited with a new understanding. I’ll talk to that guy again and it’s likely he’ll see eye to eye with me now. So, you see, effort in keeping the communication friendly and flowing totally paid off.

These things, especially when people already have set opinions, often require wisdom more then technical knowledge.